I am Extraordinarily Aggressive — This is How I Maintain It from Turning into a Downside

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I am Extraordinarily Aggressive — This is How I Maintain It from Turning into a Downside


Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their very own.

I’m aggressive, and I hate to lose. Once I really feel like somebody goes to be higher than me at one thing, it flips a swap someplace deep inside me and places me into overdrive.

This is not restricted to the work I do at FutureFund, my free fundraising platform for Okay-12 faculty teams. I need to be the perfect athlete, coach, household man and software program engineer that I might be. And for essentially the most half, this works. It motivates me to try for excellence and maintain difficult myself as a substitute of changing into too snug and stagnating.

However the identical tendency that drives me to excel at these items can typically grow to be counterproductive. My dislike of dropping is definitely so robust that I usually hate taking part in board video games. As you may think about, that may actually put a damper on household sport night time if I do not maintain it in examine.

A lot of folks in tech are like this as a result of it is a aggressive panorama. Possibly it is the identical for you: something you do, you need to do 100% — and since you put 100% of your self into one thing, it is virtually inconceivable in your success or failure to not really feel like a mirrored image of who you’re. Like me, you’ve gotten a model, and that model is: while you do one thing, you’ll succeed.

The trick is to maintain your sense of competitors wholesome in order that it serves your work and private objectives as a substitute of getting in your manner. This is how I do it — and how one can, too.

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The best way you reply to competitors is a selection

Not everybody responds to competitors in the identical manner. Folks are likely to fall into certainly one of two teams once they witness another person succeeding at a aim they’ve for themselves.

The primary group tries to sabotage the success they see in others. They ask how they will shift their competitors’s repute in order that it is adverse. That is extra generally accepted than you may assume. We are likely to look down on manufacturers who run apparent smear campaigns in opposition to their rivals, however numerous corporations get away with writing press releases that favorably evaluate their services or products to these of their greatest opponents.

The second group tries to enhance themselves to allow them to match and surpass the success they see others experiencing. They grow to be motivated to raised themselves as a substitute of casting aspersions on their rivals. This strategy can really feel like much more work, however I’ve discovered that it is also regularly way more rewarding.

The primary group’s strategy may work at first — however there are apparent dangers. Not solely can this blow again on you should you’re too heavy-handed, however it may additionally provoke your rivals and encourage them to work more durable in opposition to you than they usually would have. However the greatest downside is that specializing in others does not do something to enhance your skills.

The second group’s strategy requires you to be unflinchingly sincere with your self and your group about your strengths and weaknesses, which might be difficult at first. However it additionally pays dividends. You be taught the place to speculate your effort and time for max positive aspects. You grow to be extra environment friendly and fewer prone to blame others in your errors, and also you in the end get nearer to changing into the perfect you might be at what you are doing.

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Desirous to win vs. hating to lose

As soon as you have chosen to encourage your self as a substitute of tearing down your opponents, the subsequent query is the right way to do it. This is a technique to consider it that is at all times helped me:

It isn’t nearly eager to win; it is about hating to lose. When you’re something like me, the frustration of dropping is normally stronger for you than the enjoyment of profitable.

This does not allow you to be a sore loser on these events when it inevitably does occur — you do not need to damage household sport night time. However making it a precedence to keep away from unfavorable outcomes is commonly useful as a result of it makes you extra prone to repair the sorts of issues that individuals may let slide in the event that they’re too centered on their wins.

One among FutureFund’s main opponents in the end went out of enterprise as a result of their assist group routinely took weeks to get again to folks. This challenge would have been straightforward to right, however they let it grow to be their Achilles heel. Though it won’t have felt necessary sufficient for them to repair, it turned out to be necessary for his or her customers.

So we determined that certainly one of our non-negotiables can be to reply assist tickets in an inexpensive period of time — a few hours or much less. That was straightforward to decide to, however it had a profoundly constructive influence on our success.

Take into consideration this within the context of your startup. Staying aggressive means celebrating your wins, however by no means letting your self be complacent about the place there’s room for enchancment.

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You outline what profitable is

Lastly, you want a wholesome technique to quantify and acknowledge your wins. That may be troublesome as a result of, in enterprise, it isn’t at all times clear who’s profitable. There are not any common goalposts that everybody can see.

This is my rule: competitors is wholesome while you determine what success seems like as a substitute of letting others do it. Measure your progress by how far you have are available relation to the objectives you have set as a substitute of letting your opponents management the narrative and at all times being one step behind them.

Success, for me, is about being a little bit higher than I used to be the day earlier than. While you’re in a startup, your product will not be excellent at first — or perhaps ever. However you’re employed to verify it is higher right now than it was final month — or final week, or yesterday. This manner, you may at the very least be sure you’re on track.

When you’ve chosen your mission rigorously, this type of progress turns into a significantly better benchmark for fulfillment than what another firm is doing. You’ll be able to learn extra about that in my subsequent article beneath:

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